Gan Dainor is an obese white man who really wants you to know that what doesn't offend him should never offend you, and that what offends him should be banned by law and punishable by lengthy incarceration.
Political parties are fighting in D.C., but journalists have decided that the most critical issue facing America is the name of a football team! Which is just ridiculous, since everyone knows you can only be concerned about one thing at any given time. My psychiatrist calls it a "serious disorder." I call it "laser-focused cognition."
What's in a name? When it comes to the Redskins, The Washington Post has devoted a lot of ink to editorials roasting the name as racist and indefensible. In fact, they used 31,000 words this year alone! That's seven times the words that are in the U.S. Constitution (proof positive that the writers are Hitler-loving Communists). But most Americans, and by "most Americans" I mean me because I'm projecting myself on all of you, are not offended by the name.
Naturally, everyone critical of the name has labeled people like me, and Most Americans by proxy, as racists. This is typical of liberals, who have appointed themselves the arbiters of all morality. It's also why I have to go out of my way to tell you what Most Americans really think, and why you deserve to be beaten mercilessly for disagreeing.
Mike Wise makes no bones about his support of Race Thugging (I made that one myself! It's provocative, yet factual.). "Trying to enlighten [Most Americans] is like trying to enlighten your half-cocked, old-head uncle who uses racial epithets at Thanksgiving dinner. At some point, you either let him eat or kick him out." Wow, getting uncomfortable about your racist grandpa shouting about Jews drinking baby blood during Thanksgiving dinner? Who's the real bigot, liberals? The Dainor family has never let a single Thanksgiving pass without playing a rousing game of Madlibs: The Strom Thurmond Edition.
Redskins Owner Dan Snyder has used actual logic to defend his team's name, not white guilt. In 1932, four players and the head coach were Native Americans! And if you can think of a more racially aware time in American history, I dare you to name it!
The bottom line is that the media is once again attempting mind control. They're writing these editorials in an attempt to convince you that their point of view is the correct one, and that's just sick. The same liberals that labeled "Piss Christ" a work of art now rail against a sports team with a terrible, terrrrrible nammmeee!
Let's be honest. America has been extremely kind to Native Americans. We gave them blankets, liquor, and guns. Our military guided them on a scenic and beautiful hike to the heartland of America, where they thrive to this day. And when are white people going to get THEIR reservations? Huh!? We gave you all that out of the goodness of our hearts! I think you owe us one little racial slur that we're allowed to use. Maybe we'll even forgive you for Custer.
I've seen Pocahantas, Last of the Mohicans, and Disney's Peter Pan dozens of times. It's safe to say that I know more than enough about Native American culture than most liberals will ever forget. And as an expert in their culture, I can tell you they would be proud of an entire NFL team that honors their heritage. If they're not, we gave you your dignity, and we'll sure as heck take it away if you cross We the People. Fair warning, injuns.
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