"I can't believe we're doing this," Shelly Easton groaned. "This is the dumbest Halloween thing ever!"
Christine Wilkes had been struggling to salvage this get-together for the past three hours. And with only two of her closest friends sticking with her, she couldn't help but wonder how long it would be before she stumbled over the limits of their patience like the clumsy ass that she surely must be. This was her last hope. And boy, was it ever dumb!
"You heard about this from your uncle? You mean the annoying one who likes Ron Paul?" Marie Cantor grumbled.
"Yeah, yeah, that one. Now listen up," Christine whispered, switching off the bathroom lights. The room was thrust into smothering darkness, with only the milky light of the moon visible through a frosted glass window. As their eyes adjusted, their pale faces and moonlit hair became visible in the mirror.
"So when does the mummy jump out of the medicine cabinet or whatever?" Shelly asked. The smirk in her voice was unmistakable. Time for a bold gambit.
"Shell, why don't you perform the summoning incantation and see what does pop out?" Christine said, stepping aside and gesturing in invitation.
Shelly hesitated for a moment. As she stepped into the shaft of moonlight splashing against the marble sink, Christine saw that her friend's smirk was in terrible danger of becoming an anxious grimace.
You might not have any confidence in this bullshit, but you can sure as hell hide it. I'm practically a Senator, Christine mused.
Shelly cleared her throat and met the gaze of her ghostly reflection. "Spirits that are near and far...Twinkle, twinkle, little star--"
"Say it right so we can get out of here!" Marie whined. Her mousy face betrayed more frightened anticipation than anyone in the room.
"Fine! Don't have a stroke," Shelly muttered. She squared her shoulders and began again.
"Spirits that are near or far,
In this room as black as tar,
I speak in hopes that you will hear,
And travel to this mirror clear!"
Shelly paused for a moment as she pieced together the summoning phrase. Her breath whispered through her nose as she inhaled.
"Israel is an illegal Apartheid state!
Israel is an illegal Apartheid state!
Israel is an illegal Apartheid state!"
The air grew still as the trio held their breath. A potent brew of adrenaline and fear crept through their veins. It reminded Marie of the time that she had gotten her tonsils removed and the doctor had injected something hot and potent into her IV line before the world had begun to swim.
"Jesus, Chris, look! Please tell me you're seeing this" Shelly gasped in wonder.
Christine's face, illuminated by the strengthening blue glow of the mirror's surface, gave Shelly all the confirmation necessary. Something had been called into this room. God help them if this thing from beyond wasn't friendly.
A slender face was rendered on the mirror's silvery surface, with short-cropped hair and a strong jaw. It spoke in an authoritative, accented voice.
"I am Abraham, member of the JIDF. I have heard your Anti-Semitic words, and will not allow your obscenities to go unchallenged!"
"Christine," Shelly hissed through her teeth. "Any more wise ideas from your uncle?"
Christine stepped toward the mirror. Her uncle was batting a thousand so far, anyway.
"Begone, spirit!" Christine scolded. "Criticism of Israel is not the same thing as being an Anti-Semite!"
"SILENCE!" Abraham roared. "An attack on Zionism is an insult to all the children of Israel!"
Oh shit, that wasn't supposed to happen
"What the hell, Chris? Stop pissing him off!" Marie groaned, backing away towards the door.
"The door is sealed, fascist. Escape is not possible," Abraham said. Marie jerked her shaking hand away from the knob as if it were red hot. "I suggest you pray to your moon god now, Arabs. A drone strike is en route as we speak."
"What!? Like, an actual drone!?" Shelly shrieked.
"Yes. You deserve no less for your oppression of our plucky little state with your words of criticism."
Marie sprung back to the door, pulling and kicking on the plywood barrier that suddenly felt as though it were a bank vault.
"Isn't that kind of a disproportionate response?" Shelly shouted, eyeballing the small frosted window for signs of weakness.
"Yeah, I guess," Abraham replied. "But nobody's ever been able to hold us accountable for anything we've done before, so I doubt they're going to start with you."
Christine pinched the bridge of her nose, pushing blood into her eardrums until all she could hear was a dull roar. He mind scrambled for something, anything that could defuse this situation before the explosions began. There had to be something.
"You can't just attack the continental United States!" Shelly pleaded. "International waters are one thing, but you're taking this to a whole new level!"
International waters...Christine focused her concentration until the words were all she could see against the stark blackness of her eyelids. International waters....attack....United States....The Liberty. The Liberty!
"The U.S.S. Liberty!" Christine shouted.
Both girls froze. Confused as they were, their eyes betrayed a sliver of hope.
"What about it?" Abraham muttered, sneering at the unfavorable change of subject.
"My next door neighbor was on that ship! He tells everyone he can that the IDF knew the Liberty was an American ship before they attacked it!"
Abraham pursed his lips. "You don't say? 'Everyone' who will listen?"
"Exactly," Christine replied, gesturing broadly. "The letters to the editor, the guys at the VA hospital, the Memorial Day parade organizers. He's been rallying for a memorial plaque on the town square for years!"
All three girls knew that mean old Miss Grizzle lived in the house next door, hoarding wayward baseballs and frisbees; not to mention a few dozen cats. Christine silently prayed that her friends would set their moral inhibitions aside and roll with this.
"You don't say," Abraham said. "We've got no record of this guy. Mossad really dropped the ball on that, it seems. All right, I'll make you a deal. That is, if you're interested?"
"Hell ye--I mean, yes, sir, we are," Christine muttered.
Abraham smiled. "Good, good. There will be a terrible incident involving a gas leak and a pilot light at your neighbor's house in just a bit. You never saw me, you never heard me, and this was all just a terrible tragedy that highlights the need to install hazardous vapor detectors in every home."
"Yeah, yeah! We understand completely!" Marie said, nodding with cartoonish enthusiasm.
"Very cool, as you Americans say! Our business here is done. Shalom!"
The JIDF phantom swirled away into nothing and the bathroom was silent once more.
"Alright, please tell me somebody spiked the punch and none of that happened," Shelly gasped, slumping down onto the toilet seat.
"Not unless I got the same dose you did," Christine replied, staring with trepidation at the dark mirror.
"I only drank the Diet Coke," Marie croaked as she tried the door knob once more. It turned and opened easily.
"So what now?" Shelly asked.
In the distance, a droning engine began to crescendo as it flew westward for its rendezvous with Grizzle the Frizzled's hovel.
"First, we go to the basement and don't leave until the explosions stop."
"And then?" Marie asked.
"We stick to summoning Candyman from now on."
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