Bizarro Newtown, CT (BP)- As if Newtown did have it bad enough, Tom Hurley III completely blew it in the most shameful way on "The Kids Jeopardy!" when he misspelled the word "emancipation".
The question: "Abraham Lincoln called this document, which took effect in 1863, 'A fit and necessary war measure'"
Hurley revealed his wager of $3,000, and then his answer was uncovered.
"Jesus Christ, kid. Are you serious right now?" said an incredulous Alex Trebek.
Young Tom had utterly butchered the correct answer, writing "Emanciptation Proclamation". As the boy looked around at the host and studio audience it was clear he utterly failed to understand how dumb his mistake was.
"Check this out," said Trebek, now laughing hysterically. "This is exactly how a baby would try say 'emancipation' if you said it over and over in front of his face. How the hell do you put a 't" there, of all places?"
The answer, though technically correct, was not accepted because of Hurley's shameful inability to enunciate at an eight-grade level.
Hundreds of elderly people who clearly don't have any goddamn hobbies flocked to the "Jeopardy!" Facebook page to complain, though most of the messages were about Obama's socialism, Paula Deen's scandal, and other things that have jack-shit to do with children's trivia shows.
The show's producers released an email defending the decision made by Trebek and his staff.
"First of all, this kid wasn't going to win anyway. The other nerd had $66,600 for God's sake. And who seriously goes around calling themselves 'anything the third'? If you're not some kind of king or feudal lord, absolutely nobody cares. Furthermore, had we decided to reward him for his dumb-ass answer, we'd be sending a message to children across America that sucking as much he did is okay."
Following the show's taping, Hurley went home with $2,000 and immediately began complaining to anyone who would listen.
Meanwhile, thousands of infants just died of hunger in Africa.
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